Easier Said Than Done

Fall used to be my favorite time of year. That is during those years between school age (start of the new school year) and having tween aged children.

Fall is beautiful, warm during the day, crisp at night, usually low to no humidity, bugs are disappearing, bright night stars, full harvest moon, dry (i.e. no mud from thawing winter snows), quietness (kids back in school), falling leaves.

Now that I am a parent of two active children, fall is no longer my favorite time of year. Now it is full of beginnings of ---- this activity - that activity, find all the supplies for each activity, finish all the yard work before winter, celebrate birthdays, the realization that the winter holidays are very near, and the list goes on.

This *season* of my life is busy. I am parent, an educator, a leader, a wife, a friend, a chauffeur. During this particular stage I feel like I am not succeeding in these roles - just hanging on trying to get through from one activity to the next. It does not help that the house is under a constant state of remodel. The kitchen has been particularly trying, as the kitchen truly is the center of the home.

So I am pondering how I can enjoy this time of my life and not just "hang on." I know my children are growing and will soon be adults and gone. I will miss this time deeply. Now, how do I just settle into the role and time and relish it? This is particularly challenging for me. I like structure, I like/need down time at regular intervals which is in short supply, I crave order.

I am challenged in a book I am reading by Linda Dillow, Calm My Anxious Heart, to take my anxieties to my Blessed Controller, my Heavenly Father. God created me, knew me before my mother knew me. He appointed each and every day for me before I even came into existence. I know all this - now to move the knowledge from my head to my heart; to let go and let God. I am promised by God that He knows me better than myself and He will not allow more than I can handle. Oh do understand, to take hold of this time, to let these things in my life develop the character that God wants in my life. I am not asked to do this on my own but to let God walk beside me and even carry me, if necessary. Easier said than done for one like me that craves order and control.

When I think of the time and place I live in, my life is very easy. I am not scrounging for food, my home is secure, I am not under threat for my beliefs, I am warm in the winter, cool in the summer, I have a car, I do not have to work multiple jobs, my children and I have plenty & more. This is just a short list. Many in the this world, live in primative conditions, do not have access to healthcare, food, are under constant fear, work hard and still cannot feed or clothe their children. So really, my life is easy. I try not to forget this and to be continually thankful for my life and where I live. I tend to take the ease of my surroundings and lifestyle for granted and get easily frustrated by the small things.

This is my challenge currently. To enjoy my life for what it is, know that this time shall pass all too quickly. To enjoy that which I have been richly blessed and not let the inconveniences frustrate me. Easier said than done.